KoRn

I added some KoRn to my play list once again, I been trying to mix up all the music I like over time but for awhile they didn't have whole KoRn songs that I could add they where always bits and pieces but FINALLY they have some full songs!

Korn has been a big part of my life.. you prolly wonder why

If any of you know KoRn you prolly know Johnathan's childhood and how it was for him, I understand fully what he went though because I went though it all too, just a few things a bit different but I do understand, KoRn's music helped me realize these things where not my fault and listening to Jon sing his memories and get out his anger though the music again also helped me a great deal.

I wouldn't be where I am today if I didn't have Korn in my life during those dark times.

One song will always remind me of the day I sat and sang it with it playing in the background. (It's on my play list too)

" Kill You "

The words rang true at the time in my life when I sang this song, I will never forget the day my friends came home from school and I was singing this song I was so angry and crying I didn't' even know they where standing behind me until my friend Scott walked up behind me and called to me, I shoved him outta the way not knowing who he was because I was so upset and blinded by tears. That was the day my friends found out about my childhood.

Jon Davis is one of my heroes and I love him dearly, I want to thank him and Korn for the great music they continue to make! I seen them back in 2002 in Detroit, I would LOVE to see them again and again and they are coming to my area soon and I want to go SO FREAKING BAD! But I have a few bills I need to pay for first unfort :(

But his music I will always listen to because its like his music explains how I feel daily, again thank you :)

Big Girls Don't Cry

Da Da Da Da
The smell of your skin lingers on me now
You're probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry

The path that I'm walking
I must go alone
I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

Like the little school mate in the school yard
We'll play jacks and uno cards
I'll be your best friend and you'll be my Valentine
Yes you can hold my hand if you want to
'Cause I want to hold yours too
We'll be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds
But it's time for me to go home
It's getting late, dark outside
I need to be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity

La Da Da Da Da Da

I Can't Decide!

Okay call me crazy but um.
I can't make up my mind on what Wallflower scent to plug in next!
Strawberry Patch or Pineapple Mango!
I love both!
I was thinking maybe the pineapple mango cause it does smell yummy but then so does Strawberry!
I know I'm giving one bulb to my boss of the strawberry, when I do that things will be off balanced cause I want one bulb in the bedroom and the other in the living room...
So that's also why I think Pineapple Mango....
I could do separate fragrances in each room but that will just be a pain cause the scents will mix together ....
GAH!
decisions!

Song Lyrics - Nightwish

Wish I Had An Angel

Deep into a dying day
I took a step outside an innocent heart
Prepare to hate me fall when I may
This night will hurt you like never before

Old loves they die hard
Old lies they die harder
I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel
Your Virgin Mary undone
I`m in love with my lust
Burning angel wings to dust
I wish I had your angel tonight

I`m going down so frail `n cruel
Drunken disguise changes all the rules

Old loves they die hard
Old lies they die harder

I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel
Your Virgin Mary undone
I`m in love with my lust
Burning angel wings to dust
I wish I had your angel tonight

Greatest thrill
Not to kill
But to have the prize of the night
Hypocrite
Wannabe friend
13th disciple who betrayed me for nothing!

Last dance, first kiss
Your touch my bliss
Beauty always comes with dark thoughts

[sighing and laughter]

I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel
Your Virgin Mary undone
I`m in love with my lust
Burning angel wings to dust
I wish I had your angel tonight

I wish I has an angel.........
I wish I has an angel.........
I wish I has an angel.........
I wish I has an angel.........


Nemo

This is me for forever
One of the lost ones
The one without a name
Without an honest heart as compass

This is me for forever
One without a name
These lines the last endeavor
To find the missing lifeline

Oh how I wish
For soothing rain
All I wish is to dream again
My loving heart
Lost in the dark
For hope I`d give my everything
Oh how I wish
For soothing rain
Oh how I wish to dream again
Once and for all
And all for once
Nemo my name forevermore

My flower, withered between
The pages 2 and 3
The once and forever bloom gone with my sins

Walk the dark path
Sleep with angels
Call the past for help
Touch me with your love
And reveal to me my true name

Oh, how I wish...

Nemo sailing home
Nemo letting go

Oh, how I wish...

42 Things Rarely Asked :

1. Have you ever been searched by the cops?
nope

2. Do you have any weird sleeping habits?
hrmm, I don't think so...

3. When was the last time you've been swimming in a lake?
like uh... i dont remember it was so long ago lol

4. Would you rather sleep with someone, or alone?
Someone

5. Where is the Wizard of Oz?
Somewhere over the rainbow ;)

6. Do you consider yourself creative?
Sure

7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife?
I don't know I didn't pay attention to that honestly

8. Christina Aguilera or Britney Spears?
Christina- that girl can sing!!<-- word

9. Do you stay friends with your ex? Depends on which one.... my last one b4 my husband... naw not really... one before that... yeah kinda.... which ex are ya talkin about lol... ?

10. Do you know how to play poker? somewhat

11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight? YES! 72 hrs as well!

12. What's your favorite commercial? I havn't had tv in over a hear so I dont know lol

13. What type of food do you eat the most? Quick foods like poptarts, burgers, tv dinners... unless its a day off and i remember to take meat outta the freezer :p

14. When was the last time you had a lot of fun? Last nite Dungons & Dragons tabletop, i kicked ASS!

15. Have you ever had a Choco Taco? uh no.. what is it?

16. The Boston Red Sox or the New York Yankees? not sure

17. What kind of underwear do you have on? Fruit of the looms !

18. How often do you remember your dreams? Most of the time

19. When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried? Last Friday i think it was with Mabel and what she said LOL dirty dirty girl :P

20. What is your biggest fear? death.. um... few things

21. What's the one thing on your mind right now? getting rid of this headache

Mabel Ate 22!!!

23. Do you put salt on a turkey dinner? No. I don't put salt on anything.

24. Do you always wear your seat belt? You know it!

25. What cell service do you use? When I did have my phone... Sprint... I want my phone back i miss it :(

26. Do you like bananas? Yes, they make awesome banana bread.

27.Have you ever almost gotten into a car accident? I have been in couple

28. What do you wear to bed? t-shirt :p

29. Been caught stealing? nope

30. Do you know how to play pool? kinda i think 31.Do you like scary movies? I do !!

32. Do you truly love someone? yes!!

33. Bluegrass or rap? depends.. whos singing :P

34. If you could sleep with one famous person, who would it be? Hehehe, secerts!!

35. Skim, 1%, 2%, or whole? I perfer 2% but Joel buys 1% cause its cheeper >_>

36. What food do you find disgusting?
liver

37. Windows or Macintosh?
windows !!

38. Did you ever play, "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours"?
who hasn't!!

40. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
yes

41. Have you ever sung in front of the mirror?
yes

42. Last one who slept in the same bed as you?
Joel and our 5 kitties... Salem, Slayer, Scyko, Bubbles, and Olivia!

Zomg! Guess Who I Bumped Into Today!

LeAnn Rimes!!
She came into my work today, didn't even know it was her until I did our usual route of checking ID for credit transactions =)
It made my day!
Not much else to say atm, Dungons&Dragons tabletop is tonite...
I need my City Of Heroes fix right now! or thats all im gonna think about tonite durring D&D!!
L8R!

Hm.. Interesting..

If you’re concerned that you may be entering into an episode of stress depression and anxiety, you’ll want to know the symptoms associated with these problems and how they affect sufferers. Here are the most common symptoms of stress, depression and anxiety:

Lack of energy. This symptom is common to stress depression and anxiety and no matter how much you try, you just can’t seem to get energized for anything. This affects motivation and so you’re in a catch 22 situation. The less energetic you feel, the more your motivation levels drop. The less motivated you feel, the lower your energy levels become.

Exhaustion. This is major symptom of depression and it is so debilitating. This is a different kind of exhaustion than the exhaustion you feel say after strenuous physical exercise. In depression, the exhaustion is mentally and physically crushing. Even performing simple daily tasks is way too difficult and it doesn’t matter how much you sleep, the exhaustion just won’t go away.

Trembling Hands. This is mainly a stress or anxiety symptom. The sufferer may be in such a nervous, fearful state that the body floods with powerful chemicals such as adrenaline. In this state, the brain is in a high status of alert and trembling hands are a noticeable, physical and uncontrollable symptom. Until of course, the root cause of it is addressed and the trembles will then disappear.

Disturbed Sleeping Patterns: This symptom is common to stress, depression and anxiety and it works in 2 main ways. The suffer will either sleep too much or more likely, will only sleep for a couple of hours a night, maybe even less. In many cases, sleep is disrupted because of vivid nightmares, which some sufferers may not even remember. Other sufferers have recurring nightmares. Although these vivid dreams may cause distress, please realize that it isn’t representing anything about you, it is the stress, depression or anxiety that is causing the brain to work overtime and these vivid dreams are a symptom of this, so please don’t blame yourself or feel guilty. The nightmares will disappear once stress, depression and anxiety are under control.

Excessive Worry. Mainly a symptom of anxiety and stress, excessive worry means the sufferer worries about even the smallest of life’s events. A sufferer will be unable to find positive outcomes to anything and will continually assign negative outcomes to all situations. In continually assigning negative outcomes, life becomes very hard as sufferers are in a fearful state of mind for prolonged periods, a state that harms the body as well as the mind.

Irritable. Irritability is a major stress symptom as anyone who’s been under severe stress (and most of us have at some point in our lives) will know this all too well. When you’re under stress, you are stretched to your limit and your patience levels are thin. This explains why even the slightest thing can cause a sufferer to lose their temper or be off-handed or curt towards others. And even when the slightest mishap or accident occurs as they do so often during our daily routines, it will fuel the frustration causing more aggressive or nasty behaviour. Again, this is a symptom of stress and the irritability goes away when stress is relieved.

Isolation. Wanting to shut out the world is another major symptom of depression, although stress sufferers can sometimes seek solitude too. Retreating into a solitary, lonely world further pushes the sufferer down the depression spiral – it’s like self imposed solitary confinement – making it even harder for sufferers to find a way out of depression. This is because sufferers feel uncomfortable or even awkward around others and would rather be alone to avoid this feeling.

Panic. This anxiety symptom arises because the sufferer is convinced a catastrophic outcome to an event - or a number of events - in life is imminent. Possible examples could include a wedding, a house move, a work situation, relationship issues, illness, flying, or speaking in public. Sufferers simply cannot change this focus and the more they think about this catastrophe, the more panic stricken they become. Fortunately, there are a number of ways to address this so a person doesn’t enter the spiral that leads to panic.

Worthless Feelings. A symptom of depression although stress sufferers may also feel this way sometimes. This is a terrible feeling to have. Sufferers lose all sense of self worth, self esteem plummets and overly critical self-deprecation is performed, adding to the torment. Self confidence erodes away to nothing and at this point, an individual will find no joy in life, including pastimes and activities that previously brought them so much joy and happiness. The good news is that confidence and self esteem are skills that can be re-learned and along with many other skills form a crucial part in treating depression.

Guilt. A symptom common to stress, anxiety and depression, guilt can be a heavy burden for sufferers because it’s a lose-lose situation: They will feel guilty about things they’ve done or they will feel guilty about things they didn’t do. A continual replaying of events accompanied by regrets and “If only..” causes deep emotional anguish and heaps yet more torment on to an already tormented person. Guilt really is a powerful, destructive but ultimately worthless emotion yet the harm it inflicts on sufferers is immense. Guilt, like many other emotions, can be dealt with very effectively and this is another important skill to master in managing stress, depression and anxiety.

Headaches: Another common symptom of stress, depression and anxiety. This is a physical symptom and in some cases, the headaches turn into migraine, especially for people under severe stress. This is one symptom that shows problems like stress, depression and anxiety aren’t “all in your mind” and clearly demonstrates how stress, depression and anxiety have physical as well as mental symptoms.

Muscle Pain: Mainly a symptom of depression but stress sufferers may also suffer muscle pain. Muscle pain symptoms will typically be backache and leg cramps. These symptoms can be so painful, and a problem is that sufferers will be unaware that the pain is a symptom of depression. Once the depression is controlled, the pain vanishes.

Racing Heartbeat: Not so common with depression, more a symptom of anxiety and stress. Again, the highly-aroused emotional state floods the body with adrenaline and the heart rate rises. This may also cause “butterflies” in the tummy as well.

Loss of Appetite. A symptom common to stress, anxiety and depression, loss of appetite is perhaps one of the most obvious consequences of stress, anxiety and depression because of the emotional state of the sufferer. No one feels like eating when they’re frightened, panic stricken or feeling worthless and exhausted. There are some sufferers whose appetites have increased dramatically but they are in the minority. Loss of appetite is more common, and reducing food intake further affects energy levels and deprives the body of nourishment, further exacerbating stress, depression and anxiety. It’s important to note that the causes of stress, depression and anxiety are not rooted in diet and diet alone cannot cure any of them. However, healthy eating does have a part to play, and it should be a part of your stress, anxiety and depression treatment.

Loss of Sex Drive. Just as above, this symptom occurs because of the emotional state of the sufferer. Paradoxically, many people who are depressed can seek emotional re-assurance from sex even though their sexual appetite has decreased. So loss of sex drive doesn’t necessarily mean abstinence from sex. This is more common to depressed women than men, as for men, being in a highly stressed, anxious or depressed state can make the physical act of sex nigh-on impossible. For reasons that I hope are so obvious I need not go into any more detail! Again, as with the other symptoms, your sex drive will return once stress, depression and anxiety have been brought under control.

My Beauty Lies . . .

Where Does Your Beauty Lie?

Your Beauty lies in Plain Sight. Plain, simple and the girl next door. People tend overlook you as you are the "normal girl", but you're actually very beautiful. And you have plenty about you to set you apart, but more that lets you blend. People love the stability you have because as others may come and go, you will always be there and you may always be the same. You like simple things and that's what people like about you. You most likely enjoy things most consider normal, like movies, shopping, that sort of thing and are very friendly and probably have many friends. You are sweet and kind and that shows on you, but you're also strong and not very naive. You're a rather well-rounded individual. Even though some people pass you off as just another girl, shrug it off because they don't know what they're missing.

Some Things That Represent You:

Element:Earth, Light
Animal: Cat
Color: Pinks, Blues, Browns
Song:Girl Next Door by Pilot
Expression: Simple Smile

Gemstone:Alexandrite
Mythological Creature: Fox Demon, Hobbit
Planet: Jupiter
Hair Color: Light Brown
Eye Color:Brown

Quote:"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

Take this quiz!

FIRE!

What is your element?

Your element is Fire. Like fire, you have a hot temper and you can be warm and loving as well and angry and wild. It all really comes down to what you are feeling. You have a lot of close friends who you are very protective over, and with your temper probably some enemies too. You are not Miss/Mr Popular in school since you are your own person and don't want to be forced into behaving this or that way. You are the untamed wild horse, the kind that everyone wants to catch. But you don't want to be tied down for the moment and just keep going with your little crushes. Your will is strong and if you set your mind to do something, you will most likely succeed. But beware, your friends may not always accept your mood-swinging behaviour. Even if you don't mean to be mean, they can still feel hurt. You just need to start thinking some things through before you do them, and not always jump in with so much courage. One day you may be hurt because of that, but then again, your element isn't fire if you start to analyse situations before you act. After all, your nature is to shoot first and ask the questions later.
Take this quiz!

More Quiz'

Why are you sad?

You are sad because of your fear
Take this quiz!

Quiz Results!

What Power is Compatible With You? [beautiful anime pictures + 12 detailed results]

~*~Result nr 3~*~

Your power is: The ability to fly

Explanation: This powers speaks pretty much for itself. Though you don't need wings for this power,you can fly anyway. Some people may consider it as telekinesis since they can also fly, but you can't make material things move like they can. This ability could be a relaxing activity when you want to get away from everyday troubles. Also it is good when sneaking upon an enemy since it makes no sound. When going over to the "dark side" the power could be used to harrass and break into building through windows etc.

You are quite similar to this power since you like to have your head in the clouds. Supernatural things amuse while ordinary life does not. If your daydreaming has gotten a little too far you might be zooned out all the time, even when you are having a conversation. Your desires and/or goals tend to be unrealistic even if you know those would probably never happen. Travelling is something you would be interested in doing since seeing exotic scenery fits with your fantasies of escaping your plain life. You can also have some creative ability (writer, playing an instrumen etc) that interests you.

Negative aspects: The whole reason you may be escaping life could be fear of being let down by it. So if that would come to happen, and an important dream had been crushed you could get depressed.

Take this quiz!

The Mushy Stuff . . . .

When he wakes up in the morning and I am still asleep give me those few extra moments to sleep while he goes and gets his bathroom stuff out of the way that way when I wake up we don't have to fight and argue over it.

When he comes to wake me up he kisses me on the forehead and tackles me playfully to make me smile and laugh, I will playfully tackle him back making silly faces to make him laugh as well.

When we sit and have morning coffee, I bring him his coffee and say mornin handsome or have it on the run he smiles and tells me how beautiful I am even though we both have bed head.

When I hand him his lunch and coffee for work we will kiss and tell one another that we love each other with a smile and a be safe.

During one of his breaks he calls to say hello just cause, even if he can't get in touch with me at the time he will leave a msg on my voice mail, if he leaves a voice mail I will send him one back or a cute text msg :)

When he comes home from work that evening and I am cooking or baking or in whatever I am doing he will come up and let me know he is proud of me by pulling me close and giving me a big hug, I will give him his slippers and bring him his dinner.

When he goes out with his friends hes not afraid to kiss me goodbye in front of them or tell me he loves me

When we have quiet moments together we will look each other in the eyes and he will touch my hair/face before he kisses me while I have my arms around him and cuddled up with him.

Forgive one another when we do/say stupid things, there bound to happen.

Make one another laugh.

Make one another smile.

Make one another feel safe.

Stay up all night with one another when one or the other is sick

When you make promises to one another keep those promises

Let one another know how important you are to each other.

When you tell each other you love one another, love each other like you've never loved someone before.

When you make one another a promise, any kinda promise, keep them no matter what.

More to come soon!

Wondering . . .

Another Women?

First thing that comes to mind . . .

Awww, hehe.

Every girl dreams that one day she will find a guy that does these Things for her. even the smallest action can have the BIGGEST impact in someones life.

• give her one of your t-shirts to sleep in.
• leave her cute text notes.
• kiss her in front of your friends.
• tell her she looks beautiful.
• look into her eyes when you talk to her.
• let her mess with your hair.
• touch her hair.
• just walk around with her.
• FORGIVE her for her MISTAKES.
• look at her like she's the only girl you see.
• tickle her even when she says stop.{unless she looks really mad}
• hold her hand when you're around your friends.
• when she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her.{extra points}
• let her fall asleep in your arms.
• get her mad, then kiss her.{extra points}
• stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything
• tease her and let her tease you back.
• stay up all night with her when she's sick.
• watch her favorite movie with her.
• kiss her forehead.
• give her the world.
• let her wear your clothes.
• when she's sad, hang out with her.
• let her know she's important.
• kiss her in the pouring rain.{she'll LOVE you forever}
• when you fall in love with her, tell her.
• and when you tell her, love her like you've never loved someone before.

Kisses ^_~

What kind of kiss are you?

You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss that never lessens and always blows your partner away like the first time.
Take this quiz!

Questions.....

1. Where were you at 3:18pm yesterday?
Playing City Of heroes

2. How did you get the idea for your MySpace name?
Evey - its a highschool nickname

3. What song are you listening to right now?
nothing

4. What color is your phone?
white

5. Do you click on pop-ups?
ummm, NO

6. Do you own an iPod?
no

7. What was the first thing you thought this morning?
So freaken tired...

8. Is the person you have a crush on older or younger than you?
older

9. What did you do last night?
playing city of heroes

10. What’s your favorite memory from this weekend?
spending time with my friends from AZ

11. What are the last two digits of your phone number?
78

12. What was the last thing that you had to eat?
Nachos & Cheese Dip

13. Who is the last that you hugged?
Joel

14. What was the last movie you watched?
I don't remember now! Frap it was so freaken good too!

15. What do you dislike at the moment?
I rather not say but I am really not happy about ..... most of ya know :p

16. What food are you craving?
nothing right now

17. What did you dream last night?
It was freaky, I had a dream of being trapped in a room then running from a crazy person >_<

18. What was the last TV show you watched?
I Don't have tv....

19. What is your favorite piece of jewelry?
My heart necklace & my amber braclet.. i love em both <3

20. Name 2 ppl on your Top Friends who are most like you?
Shy & Mabel

21. Do you always lock your door?
yes!

23. Are you on any medication?
no

24. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
On the whole thing! I sleep by myself, well unless Joels home and im sleeping then usually where I want.. but I usually perfer the wall side if there is one :)

25. What color shirt are you wearing?
Burgendy

26. What is your favorite frozen treat?
frozen yogert!

27. How many Piercings/tattoos do you have?
4 piercings

28. What's your favorite store?
Bath & Body Works!

30. Who's someone you haven't seen in a while and miss?
My grandparents, Id also like to take a trip to AZ to visit Mabel & bunches of other friends

31. What was the last text you sent?
omw home

32. Do you care what people think about you?
i dont care what people think

33. Have you ever done something to make trouble?
I am trouble ;) but no i havn't done something in awhile

34. Where do you wish you were right now?
I really wanna visit grandma & grandpa or my friends in AZ

35. What is your font color on AIM/MSN?
black

36. Where do you live?
Missouri

37. Have you ever moshed?
yea good times :)

39. Do you like the person who posted this last?
I don't remember who it was.. honestly... I copied and pasted and let it sit on my desktop for a week, im sorry but I know I really like the person ya :)

40. Do you know their birthday?
no

41. What is the thing that you would most like to change about you?
I like who I am, but losing some more weight.. hmm few things nothign major tho.

42. What words do you say a lot?
heyas, have a good one, eh... few :)

43. What do you smell like right now?
pink grapefruit body spray

44. What is your favorite color?
black, blue, red, green, purple.. few ;)

45. Do you like mustard?
yes

46. What do you tell yourself when times get hard?
ah shit, I can get though this, done it b4 :)

47. Would you ever sky dive?
dunno

48. What color is your pillow case?
purple

49. If you could say something to your ex what would it be?
nothing

50. Who was the last person you saw with their shirt off?
Joel

51. Do you enjoy giving hugs?
yes, a hug a day is good for a person :) makes em feel good

52. Have you ever been to Australia?
no

53. Do you own a digital camera?
yup

54. What celebrities do people say you look like
can't remember now

55. Who is your favorite Star Wars character?
Yoda!

56. Does it annoy you when someone says they'll call but don't?
sometiems ya

57. Are you a jealous person?
no

58. What was the last thing you typed?
ummm,O.o .... the answer to the last question

59. Do you ever feel guilty about eating meat?
nope

60. If you were born the opposite gender, what would your name be?
I don't know accually :)