Smackdown Live!

Hubby & I with our friend James (red hat)

Hubby with our friends that went to Smackdown also

The rest of the group =)

Weight Loss 2018 Update!

I been working on some of my side by sides for comparison to see how things have gone in the last year to the last 2 years, even with as many set backs as i had due to death in the family, multiple times to many other things I still kept going forward, even if i had to take a few weeks off to grieve and get though everything.

This week I also said goodbye for now to Salem as she passed away in my arms taking her last breaths, Thing was she passed her physical and our vet said she believed she would pull though even tho she had renal disease cause some cats can live with it, my poor girl went downhill quickly.

So unexpected. But i believe shes at the rainbow bridge with our other fur babies and they are all playing together, now to focus on myself, my other 2 fur babies and hubby. 2 years ago I lost another fur baby in my arms who i had for 18 years he had a heart murmur, but i could tell this is how they both wanted to go, at home, with me. Someday i believe we will see them again

Sometimes life can kick us down, even if our legs are a little wobbly as we try to stand tall, those of us around us can help us by being our support beams. I still have crying spells from time to time but getting though everything.

In the start i looked back at some old medical papers, I was pushing 400, today im down to 238. I was over 100 inches in my waist wearing 5-6x clothes in mens now to wearing a XL or L depending on the make, but in womens sizes not mens, to having 40+ inches in my thighs and arms. Thighs today are down to a 23" and arms are 16". Still got a lot of work to do but im ready to keep going and doing it. I carry around now almost 115lbs of muscle mass, which is exciting, all my progress is! Even the 3 inches I grew!

Going from that girl that was made fun of for being in shape doing sports/weight lifting/track to being told no guys would ever want me cause i was such a tomboy to gaining 200+lbs having guys flock, to who I am now. Not changing only physically but mentally too!

My friend said that said she would cosplay Hellcat when I cosplay She-Hulk.... She-Hulk needs her gains and losses and to meet her goals, so lets do this!

Pic on the right is the outfit I plan on wearing when I get a photo op with Lita & Trish, two wrestlers from the attitude era in wrestling back in the late 90s early 2000s ^_^

Salem 2001-2018

Salem was the kitty that always hated guys. But when she met Joel that was a whole other story, he was the guy that she fell in love with and only guy she really liked.

She was the runt of her litter so she got the nickname Princess Salem

Last Thursday Salem seemed a bit off so I took her to the vets, they said she was dehydrated and her red blood cell count was a bit high but could be due to dehydration.

The rest of her tests came back Friday showing renal disease. Which our vet said that she showed signs of a kitty that was gonna fight her way back to being healthy, she didn't show signs of being ready to go to the rainbow bridge. Rest of Friday went well, Saturday too. She was drinking lots of water and low sodium chicken broth and eating food.

She didn't like the kidney food though once I brought it home, but still managed to eat bits of it here and there exp after I put some chicken broth with it. Sunday was nothing but chicken broth and water, very little to no food.

Today I woke up just before Noon to use the rest room, Salem was sleeping on the couch, perked up when she heard me coming, I got her to drink some water but she wouldn't touch her food. The last few days she was still wandering around, jumping on the couch and our bed to hang out with us, alert and still being Salem just a bit more tired then her usual self. I went back to bed to rest some more.

Today I woke up at 3pm cause our Orkin guy was coming. Bless his heart he didnt' do the inside when we told him that our kitty wasn't feeling well, he didn't wanna stress her out by spraying in the house, so he also took $30 off the price since he just did outside.

When I woke up though i got her to drink some water but still nada on food. I picked her up and she was super weak, her breathing started acting up, I started having flashbacks to when Slayer passed away in my arms almost 2 years ago.

She called out to me a few times as I held her but she just wanted to lay down on the couch, I let her, she was thirsty but to tired to do it herself so i gave her some in a syringe along with some more broth.

My friend Haley bless her heart was getting off work and brought me some pedilite, we opened it to give Salem a little, she drank it though the syringe but no sooner then that she jumped off the couch and her back legs gave out. I told Haley maybe its time to take her down to the emerg vet office. I didn't wanna give up on her, she was putting up one hella fight too these last few days.

I then picked her up as she cried for me i knew this was it.... it was the same cry as Slayer had when he passed in my arms. Moments passed as I told her to go be with Slayer that she was a good girl and I love her.

She passed in my arms tonight, I am thankful my best friend Haley was here with me since Joel is at work.

Salem is resting in the other room in her blanket for now til I can get her to the vets in the morning and make kitty arrangements

Thank you everyone for the thoughts and prayers though this tough time I love all of you

She isnt' now just with Bubbles, JR and Olivia but she is also reunited with her one true love Slayer I miss them all everyday but I know they are all not suffering now and chasing those birds at the rainbow bridge, til we all meet again my babies Mommy & Daddy love you guys

KCXW

Hubby and I went to a new wrestling promo that we saw at KCCC back in November and decided to hit up their show this month to see what it was all about!

We had a ton of fun, here are some of many photos I took!

Charlie got excited when they let him hold the belt lol :)

The wrestlers got together to present a belt to the mother of one of the young wrestlers that recently passed away, it was a truly emotional moment.

2018!

Wishing everyone a Happy New Year!

I started getting serious about my weight loss again in 2015 early summer, since then I had many set backs of gains, had some losses but I managed though it all to get healthy again with my numbers in my blood work, scale still needs work though!

When I was in high school I got made fun of for being fit and doing track, sports and weight lifting, girls telling me I was a tomboy and no guys would wanna date me cause I looked like a boy. After high school I packed on 200+lbs and guys flocked I thought I was doing something right.

But the damage to my confidence and self esteem and self worth was done.

I am here today Jan 1st 2018, 18 years later, still getting back on track, it took me so long to not fix myself only physically but mentally also.

Back in 2010 I lost over 150lbs but got scared and gave up, this time I am not gonna let it. Though hard work of eating right with the occasional cheat meal to working my ass off mainly lifting at the gym.

Sure the last 2 years life decided to toss loss in our family, it wasn't easy, i spent days and in some cases weeks trying to recover from crying and being sad and depressed, losing someone is never easy. It happened multiple times over the last 2 years, but we pull ourselves together and get though the struggles thanks to our family & friends around us.

Even during the times I was going for tests at my doctors to get the final word if I had PCOS and they even checked for cancer among other things, thankfully clean bills of health

So even though there was dark days, blessings followed in some way, so I am thankful.

Hoping 2018 and here on out is the best for everyone

Remember Don't give up, you got this!!

I am down over 125lbs now and 58 inches in my waist, still got more work to do but I am hoping to be at my goal at years end of 200+lbs lost, and being able to cosplay She-Hulk at comicon!

Lets do this!

The right photo is the last photo I took of myself in 2017, lets see what 2018 brings!

#payitforward

So the other night I went shopping online cuz I had a 40% coupon, I got $20 in free bonus cash since well i just bought stuff lol.

Found out today a friend needed a new coat for her son cause he out grew his old one and money is tight for her, I knew I wouldn't need the $20 bonus cash right away & it would prolly expire before Id use it cause I really don't need to spend more money right now and I didn't see anything i really needed, (it also expires in 3 days so yeah and I knew hubby wouldn't mind exp since it was well free money) so I gave it to my friend along with the 20% coupon, she was able to get a $75 coat for $25! She only had $60 to last 2 weeks before her and her hubby get paid again.

Thing is i got called selfish a few weeks ago from someone i had to cut outta my life because i was tired of one sided friendships. If I was so selfish would I have seriously done something like this? Nahhh!

I am just glad and happy I was able to help a friend that needed it, ive always been this kinda person, to many ppl have taken advantage of it over the years, reason those so called "friends" have been slowly weeded out of our lives and kept the friends close that appreciate it and return the favor when needed if not to us but someone else

If you can in life its always good to help someone who really needs it if your able, it made my day hearing about how excited her son was for his jacket, things like this just make you happy knowing you helped those in need.

I cried happy tears tonight knowing I put a smile on their faces

126lbs lost!

Past, year: 2000:

Getting made fun of for being in shape, hiding myself under sweat suits even in 100 degree summers, girls in high school & girls home i lived in made fun of me, saying i looked like a boy, no guys wanted to be with me etc. I gained 200lbs after high school over 17 years ago, guys flocked and i thought i was doing something right, so i stopped giving a shit about myself. Damage to my confidence and self esteem and self worth was done.

2005-2015:

I tried to get on track when Hubby & I first got married but the stress of moving to the US wasn't helping. So i got set in my ways. 2009 I seen a doctor who sent me down the wrong path, she had me on unlimited meat, eggs, cheese and 20 carbs a day ONLY from veggies. Everything else was cut out.

3 months passed my numbers on my heath cart were though the roof. But the doctor insisted i continue. Another 3 months went by I was in tears, sure i lost 60lbs but i was feeling like crap. My hubby started a new job and i went and got a 2nd opinion once the health coverage kicked in, turns out due to the diet etc the doc had me on, i was 3 months shy of having a heart attack and dying at 26 years old. Doctors told me to go get whole grain pasta and eat! I cried and ate the whole box that night. That crazy doc even had me on diabetic meds even though i wasn't diabetic ! 4 times the amount a normal diabetic would take, scary stuff!

I eventually in 19 months lost 156lbs, but I got scared thinking back to high school and fell backwards in my ways. Because of the making fun and stuff i went though in high school for being in shape.

May 2015:

Finally may 2015 I started getting back on track again. I was tired all the time. So I sat and wrote myself this list.... (at the time i had kids stuff on this list too til i found out i couldn't have kids)

Pros

- Living a long time to spend with my hubby/family/friends

- Being able to do things (run/walk/lift etc) and not be outta breath

- Enjoy more of what life has to offer

to name a few things, the cons always out weigh'd the bad

Cons

- Dying early

- Leaving my family/hubby/friends behind

- Being so overweight when i do pass on they casket will cost more being more heavy then my poor family having to carry my body being so heavy someone may hurt themselves

- Having my hubby wait on me hand and foot cause id be so overweight i can't do things for myself (bathe, cook, clean etc)

- Health insurance costing more

- Not getting a lot with life insurance

to name a few other things, it keeps me motivated to get my ass in check even more!

I had to give myself tough love.

Today:

Realization & Motivation. Realizing that the haters are over 1000 miles away in another country. I gave myself a goal of cosplaying She-Hulk at comicon next year in 2018.

Still working on self esteem and confidence, its a endless battle for the moment but very much improved over the last 17 years.

As you know Hubby and I now workout together, we both knew we let ourselves go to long. We been married 12.5 years now. He used to be into bodybuilding back in the army but seeing me in my ways I am sure it made him fall in bad ways too. Not to mention my cooking and my Canadian portion sizes as he teased me. Cause I always did huge portions.

I also had a bad habit of when i went shopping for food, id buy junk food and hide it. Candy, chips, soda, etc. It was bad, to this day I finally admitted to hubby that I used to do these things, he about fell over. Cause he never knew til now. I don't have that habit now thankfully I broke it!

We both wanna live a long time together its important to us. We can't have kids, we tried to adopt but no luck there either. So we want to make the best of life. Make our next life the one we are able to have a lot of kids in 　

Im not going back this time, only forward

In 28 months im down 126lbs and almost 60 inches in my waist, it was hard getting back on track after the first gain loss gain. I dont' wanna do that again cause next time it will be even harder.

I would of been down more but a year ago after working out at home for just over a year and losing 115lbs. I joined a gym. But the trainer I had at my last gym was telling me to eat more, training 5 days a week 2-3hrs a day.... I didn't weigh myself for quite a few months but i felt like I was bloated all the time and I didn't feel any different. I jumped on the scale, i ended up gaining 50lbs back in 6 months!~

January this year I started doing my own thing again. Lost 10lbs and 5 inches in that month doing my husbands old workout routine from when he was in the army.

April this year i joined a new gym, new trainer, new food coach even, 6 weeks and down 15lbs and 6 more inches! Even more since then!

But anyway, that's that